#1 08-07-2012 9:17 pm

Ajimator
Registered: 07-23-2012
Posts: 6

august comp WIP commit suicide

hi all, this is my first post, critic and suggestions are very welcome.



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someone who wanted to commit suicide because always got bullied.

Last edited by Ajimator (08-08-2012 3:07 pm)

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#2 08-08-2012 12:32 pm

J.K. Riki
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From: PA, USA
Registered: 11-04-2009
Posts: 3314
Karmojo: 79
Productive!

Re: august comp WIP commit suicide

Kind of really dark, but it tells the story I guess.


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#3 08-08-2012 3:09 pm

Ajimator
Registered: 07-23-2012
Posts: 6

Re: august comp WIP commit suicide

thanks JKR,

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#4 08-08-2012 5:34 pm

J.K. Riki
Rockstar
From: PA, USA
Registered: 11-04-2009
Posts: 3314
Karmojo: 79
Productive!

Re: august comp WIP commit suicide

One thing looking at it again, you might consider him look off "into the distance" on "own the stage" because right now he sort of looks at the camera, which makes it seem like he's talking to us the audience. Unless that's what you're shooting for. smile


Animator Island - for Secrets of Animation, updated Mondays
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Creative Inspiration weekly at JKRiki.com

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#5 08-09-2012 2:49 am

Ajimator
Registered: 07-23-2012
Posts: 6

Re: august comp WIP commit suicide

JKR : actually there is still another story at the end of this short film, which makes this film turned into a funny, probably about 4 - 5 second more. but I'm not sure can finish it, because there is still a lot works I need to do now, sad
by the way thanks for your suggestion.

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#6 08-11-2012 5:27 pm

xenon13
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From: Batam, Indonesia
Registered: 02-10-2011
Posts: 12
Karmojo: 72

Re: august comp WIP commit suicide

eh ada mas Aji big_smile... bagus idenya ... Rusunawa Kabil juga bagus tuh haha... can't wait for the final animation.
P.S : please give advise in my submission too wink


learning by keyframing smile

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#7 08-11-2012 8:03 pm

Ajimator
Registered: 07-23-2012
Posts: 6

Re: august comp WIP commit suicide

hahaha,, thanks mas sutikno, big_smile

it is only half from the whole story, there is still a continuation that make the film change become to funny story.
total of the the duration is about 18 seconds, i has recently been completed, and i just want to rendering now, hehe..

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#8 08-11-2012 9:05 pm

xenon13
Rockstar
From: Batam, Indonesia
Registered: 02-10-2011
Posts: 12
Karmojo: 72

Re: august comp WIP commit suicide

sounds good... I can't wait. post it... post it haha


learning by keyframing smile

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#9 08-29-2012 7:27 pm

Skyefish
From: South Africa
Registered: 03-24-2012
Posts: 29

Re: august comp WIP commit suicide

wow really great work for such a short time! :-P


i will sleep when i'm dead :-P

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#10 08-30-2012 2:07 am

pollywoggles
From: Los Angeles
Registered: 06-24-2012
Posts: 89

Re: august comp WIP commit suicide

Actually, it might have more impact, if you didn't have that first establishing shot of the building.  That would allow us to slowly realize what's happening.


Paul

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