#1 07-10-2007 9:09 am

graphic_crap
Upstanding Citizen
From: Bangalore
Registered: 06-12-2007
Posts: 9
Karmojo: 35

Trying for the First time .... please comment my blocking

I think 11 sec club is a good idea. I'm participating for every month from now..i can atleaast have a good show reel at the end even if i didn't win any competitions. This month's sound clip is cool. here's my blocking... please gimme honest (harsh too)comments... i'd love to learn from it.


Direct Link




waiting... a few more days to go....

thanx in advance guyz smile


" when life gives you a lemon, wing it right back ...and add some lemons of your own "

Offline

 

#2 07-10-2007 10:26 am

aaroncmt
Rockstar
From: Waikato, New Zealand
Registered: 06-12-2007
Posts: 168
Karmojo: 76
Productive!

Re: Trying for the First time .... please comment my blocking

Not too bad.  I like the ending.  Maybe one too many poses for the acting, though... Maybe have only half as many poses there.  The gun pull at the end wasn't 100 percent obvious.  Maybe have the gun black and a little more gun like for staging purposes.  Definitley tone down the movement with the guy talking, though...
Good first pass!


Kiwi Animator

Offline

 

#3 07-10-2007 11:50 am

graphic_crap
Upstanding Citizen
From: Bangalore
Registered: 06-12-2007
Posts: 9
Karmojo: 35

Re: Trying for the First time .... please comment my blocking

aaroncmt wrote:

Not too bad.  I like the ending.  Maybe one too many poses for the acting, though... Maybe have only half as many poses there.  The gun pull at the end wasn't 100 percent obvious.  Maybe have the gun black and a little more gun like for staging purposes.  Definitley tone down the movement with the guy talking, though...
Good first pass!

thanx bro. that's really helpful. i'll try to use less poses .. i had plans to open a knife instead of gun..i am still modeling it..will put it in next pass. thanx for the help smile


" when life gives you a lemon, wing it right back ...and add some lemons of your own "

Offline

 

#4 07-10-2007 12:24 pm

aja
Administrator
Registered: 05-29-2007
Posts: 1311
Karmojo: 35
Administrator

Re: Trying for the First time .... please comment my blocking

Good start!  I agree that there's too many poses, specifically the one on "someone else's mail" and "consider the", I'd hold those in their previous poses instead of switching to new ones.  And like Aaron said, the silhouette on the gun (knife) hand isn't very readable, he's not pointing it at the guy. 

Looking forward to the next pass!  smile

Offline

 

#5 07-11-2007 8:58 am

mayanimator
Upstanding Citizen
Registered: 06-15-2007
Posts: 61
Karmojo: 32

Re: Trying for the First time .... please comment my blocking

Hi ,
I agree with aaroncmt ...nice suggestion  .....many poses are there
I think in first pose hogan right hand looking awkward like he is resting his hand on his head .... while he stand so much backside ..I know you are trying to give some space to Alfred... but if u stand hogan near to table... It will look fine... while in last when he say "all done" I think Alfred don't have enough time to sit ... u can show standing scary  pose........I think this will hlp u some how....

great going keep it up......

Offline

 

#6 07-11-2007 9:37 am

Adriel
Upstanding Citizen
From: Kissimmee, FL
Registered: 06-21-2007
Posts: 173
Karmojo: 39

Re: Trying for the First time .... please comment my blocking

Good work on the blocking! smile I like how he slides the computer to in front of Afred and how Alfred gets up from the chair. i really like the pose for when he says consider too. I agree with making the knife pose look more readable. Its still a good pose but maybe it will read better when you get the knife in there.

Keep it up!

Offline

 

#7 07-11-2007 1:25 pm

graphic_crap
Upstanding Citizen
From: Bangalore
Registered: 06-12-2007
Posts: 9
Karmojo: 35

Re: Trying for the First time .... please comment my blocking

Adriel wrote:

Good work on the blocking! smile I like how he slides the computer to in front of Afred and how Alfred gets up from the chair. i really like the pose for when he says consider too. I agree with making the knife pose look more readable. Its still a good pose but maybe it will read better when you get the knife in there.

Keep it up!

hey thanx for that. actually my modeling skills sucks..that's y took time to put the knife in..now that it's done. i'll put my in-progress stage with more in betweens soon. thanx for the suggestions bro. it really helps


" when life gives you a lemon, wing it right back ...and add some lemons of your own "

Offline

 

#8 07-11-2007 1:30 pm

graphic_crap
Upstanding Citizen
From: Bangalore
Registered: 06-12-2007
Posts: 9
Karmojo: 35

Re: Trying for the First time .... please comment my blocking

mayanimator wrote:

Hi ,
I agree with aaroncmt ...nice suggestion  .....many poses are there
I think in first pose hogan right hand looking awkward like he is resting his hand on his head .... while he stand so much backside ..I know you are trying to give some space to Alfred... but if u stand hogan near to table... It will look fine... while in last when he say "all done" I think Alfred don't have enough time to sit ... u can show standing scary  pose........I think this will hlp u some how....

great going keep it up......

many poses is one of my weaknesses sad i really do overacting sometimes. thanx for the suggestions bro. and about hogan moving back..it's true..i put him a lil too far. i'l definitely try making him closer.   about alfred's sitting..i want a madagascar snappy action..he's so scared and he just want to show hogan that he didn't tell all those things but he's working on the mail smile i hope the snappy works..

and the hand on Alfred's shoulder, i was just trying to show hogan is bossing the situation in the beginning...it made the staging too clumsy i guess..i'll try a better pose for sure.. thanx for the comment dude.


" when life gives you a lemon, wing it right back ...and add some lemons of your own "

Offline

 

Board footer

Powered by PunBB
© Copyright 2002–2005 Rickard Andersson